About Me + TTC Timeline

I’m a girl, who wants a baby, who’s learned about heartbreak and loss along the way.

I’m 34 years old and live in Los Angeles with my husband and chihuahua. These past two years, I joined an all too silent group: women experiencing infertility and pregnancy loss.

I have suffered two miscarriages. The grief and devastation I experienced after each loss was beyond anything I could have anticipated. During my grieving process, I found significant comfort and support by reading about the experience of others, whether through forums, blogs, or in books, and it helped me to feel less alone.

This blog is a collection of writing, reflections, resources, and a sharing of my experience in the hopes of being one more voice in the community to let other women know they are not alone in their suffering.

I know there are countless couples out there that have have suffered much longer and gone through far worse than we have, and my heart goes out to all of them.

 

OUR STORY SO FAR

6.16.12: Our wedding day!

3.1.13: Take the official plunge into TTC.

6.15.13: First positive pregnancy test. Tears of joy!

6.21.13: Find out my best friend is also expecting, and our due dates are two days apart.

7.2.13: First ultrasound at 8 weeks. We hear a strong heartbeat, but are told our baby is measuring small (6w 3d).

7.7.13: I start bleeding. We rush to the emergency room. 4 hours later we are told we’ve lost the baby.

8.8.13: Get the ok to start TTC again.

11.1.13: Second positive pregnancy test. Cautious celebration.

11.12.13: I go in for an early 5 week ultrasound. All we see is a gestational sac.

12.2.13: Find out my sister-in-law is also expecting, and our due dates are two days apart.

12.3.13: I go in for an 8 week ultrasound. Still, we only see a gestational sac and confirm the pregnancy is not viable. We discuss options to terminate.

12.5.13: Arrive at the surgical center for a D&C. Spend the next few days recovering from the procedure. Spend much longer trying to recover emotionally.

12.15.13: Discuss testing options with my OBGYN. Blood is taken to test for chromosomal abnormalities and blood clotting disorders.

12.30.13: All tests come back normal. Am told we just need to try again and there’s no more testing to do.

1.6.14: See a perinatologist for a second opinion. Am told we just need to try again and there’s no more testing to do.

1.7.14: Talk to two other OBGYNs we are put in touch with through friends for a third and fourth opinion. Am told two more times we just need to try again and there’s no more testing to do.

1.10.14: Ignore all the doctors and take my husband to see a urologist. Have a semen analysis done. Have a sperm DNA fragmentation test done. Find out he has low sperm morphology and a varicocele. Find out he needs surgery to correct the varicocele.

2.7.14: My best friend gives birth. I feel grief as I pass the due date of my first baby.

2.16.14: My husband has surgery, followed by 2 weeks of recovery time.

2.26.14: Again, I ignore all the doctors and decide to see a fertility specialist. She says there’s still more testing I can do. She draws more blood to test for thyroid, TSH, FSH, Estradiol, AMH, Prolactin, Factor V Leiden, Antithrombin III, Protein C Activity, Protein S Activity, & Prothrombin Gene Mutation, as well as perform a saline sonogram. We discover I have high TSH (sub-clinical hypothyroidism) and a uterine septum. Schedule a hysteroscopy to surgically remove the septum.

4.17.14: Have the hysteroscopy to remove the uterine septum. Prescribed estrogen and progesterone to promote healing.

5.20.14: Return to the RE after my first cycle completed after the surgery. RE finds a cyst and says to take this cycle off from trying.

6.29.14: Return to the RE to see if my cyst is gone. It is! After 7 months we finally have the approval to start trying again. Prescribed progesterone suppositories to take for 14 days after ovulation, and instructed to take baby aspirin every day.

7.28.14: BFN. Talk to my RE and due to an upcoming change to our health insurance we decided to do an IUI while we still have full fertility coverage. Prescribed 5mg of Femara for CDs 3 – 7.

8.7.14: IUI #1 complete!

8.21.14: Big fat negative. IUI #1 failed.

8.26.14: Go in for a CD 2 scan to start IUI #2, only to learn that the Femara left me with a large cyst and we can no longer go forth with the IUI this cycle.

9.23.14: Follow up CD 3 scan to check on cyst. It’s gone! Approved to begin trying again. Turn down Femara and IUI and instead opt to try naturally.

9.29.14: I have an HSG performed, and it confirms that my tubes are clear and there is no scarring from the hysteroscopy or D&C.

10.13.14: BFP #3 at 10dpo!

11.3.14: 1st ultrasound, we see a healthy heartbeat of 124 and baby is measuring 6w4d.

11.10.14: 2nd ultrasound, baby is measuring 7w2d with a heartbeat of 155.

11.17.14: 3rd ultrasound, baby is measuring 8w2d with a heartbeat of 164.

11.24.14: 4th ultrasound, baby is measuring 9w3d with a heartbeat of 160. We officially graduate from our RE’s office and are released to a regular OB.

12.3.14: First appointment with the OB, who performs a 5th ultrasound. Baby is measuring 11w4d (a full 8 days ahead) with a heartbeat of 160.

12.11.14: NT scan at the perinatal diagnostic center for first trimester screening. Risk for downs syndrome comes back very low. Baby is measuring 12w2d with a heartbeat of 174.

2.5.15: 20 week anatomy scan. Baby is measuring in 80th percentile. All looks great, except for some slight concern over a bright spot on baby’s heart, which sometimes can be a soft marker for Downs Syndrome. Decide to take the MaterniT21 blood test, which came back normal.

4.4.15: 28 weeks and beginning of 3rd trimester!

6.28.15: We pass our official due date.

7.4.15: Our baby boy is born at 3:12am, weighing 8 pounds, 9 ounces and measuring 22 inches long. We are overjoyed and filled with gratitude for our healthy son.

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29 thoughts on “About Me + TTC Timeline

  1. I admire your strength and refusal to take just one doctor’s advice. Praying your surgeries did the trick and that all will go perfectly when you’re ready to start trying again.

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  2. Alexis – I have LOTS to say. (We old people chatter…) But, first, know how incredibly impressed I am with the stalwart path you and Sean are taking. Baby will come, no doubts here. Especially now that I read your exciting recent news!
    But what also strikes me – I say this as somewhat of a control person myself (OK, OK, I’m OC ) is your round-and-rounds, your machinations about WHY – whether all your planning, your strategizing worked against you in some weird way. Nope. If you’re a planner and love control then that’s who you are. Enjoy!
    (And when baby comes you’ll throw that side of you out the window in two seconds! But don’t worry, it’s just sidelined for 20 years or so. Your sense of control will come back after baby graduates from Stanford which is clearly where he or she is going to college.)
    Last thing. One of the coolest things you have going for you is that you WANT TO BE A MOM. This comes from having had such a GREAT one yourself!
    Love, MJ from the Birthday Cluv

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    • Thanks so much for taking the time to read my blog and write such a thoughtful response! It means a lot to me and makes me feel so supported. I’ve done a lot of reflecting this past year, and this journey has helped me learn how to limit the self-blame and to let life takes its course on its own timeline. Not always easy! Thank you again for your nice words. I do have a great mom! Much love. xo

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  3. I really hope that you’ve found the reasons for your losses and you get your rainbow baby soon. We are our best (and sometimes only) advocates and it is great that you pushed for answers!

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  4. I just stumbled across your blog and am so sorry for the losses you have experienced. I lost my second baby last week, and it is devastating. I think it is so great that you have been advocating for yourself despite being told there is no more testing. We are currently waiting for our own test results but I will certainly keep this in mind, that you have to be your own best advocate and to question, question, question.

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    • Oh, I am so sorry about your loss. That breaks my heart. The second loss is so hard, because it fills you with fear in a way the first loss doesn’t. The only way I could get courage to try again was to push for as much testing and answers as I could. You’ll be in my thoughts. I hope you are surrounded by love and comfort during this time of healing ❤

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  5. I am so sorry about your losses. I have lost six babies (a set of twins, two singletons, and two frozen embryos that didn’t survive) as well as had one healthy baby three years ago. The pain of miscarriage is agonizing. I get it. Praying for you.

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  6. I just came across your blog and wanted to thank you for sharing your story! I miscarried for the 3rd time in October and my husband and I just visited an REI this week. As soon as my next cycle starts we will begin all of the testing you mentioned above. I’m praying for an answer and your story give me hope!

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  7. Congrats on your pregnancy!! It gives me hope. I have a large septum too. It was first detected during my HSG and confirmed with a MRI. I have the surgery in 2 weeks. We have been ttc for one year. I am hopeful this surgery will be our answer. Sending you best wishes!

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  8. Alexis, Thank you for your blog. 5 hysteroscopies later and I am finally free of the septum that has caused infertility my entire life. Here is hoping to join you on the other side with a healthy pregnancy.

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  9. Thank you so much for sharing your story… I too have experienced two consecutive miscarriages at 28 years old. The first July 2015 and the second January 2016. Despite the “there’s nothing we can do” I have gotten from several doctors, I am scheduled for a consultation with a fertility specialist. It brings me hope to know that through persistence you were able to have a healthy baby. Again, thank you for the encouragement!!

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